Ladies...You Gotta Let Them Lead!
01.22.07

One of the most common complaints from followers is the lack of good leaders. Whether here in the local dance community of South Florida or across the nation, the sentiment is echoed far and wide. Since the population disparity between leaders and followers is fairly large in most areas, this lack takes a dominating place on the dance landscape.
 
Now before the guys take their ball and run home, we really need to discuss some of the things that the followers do that exacerbate the situation. As an instructor and a leader, my concern is always to take care of my partner(s), no matter what level she may be. There are some leaders who are not as sensitive about their partners as they should be. However, to say that this is all landing on the male side of the fence is not accurate. Many followers have been less than helpful in looking after their partners.
 
When a follower tells me someone doesn't lead, my first question is a reality check..." Do you really let him lead?" Sometimes I get blasted for this, but bear with me just a sec...
 
I have seen many followers who have a habit in their anchor of going back-together-forward on their anchor steps. If a follower is coming forward before "the one" in any pattern, she has already jumped past the opportunity of the leader to do his job. So many ladies are trying to help by getting things rolling or anticipating what their partner is going to do and literally making that decision for him. This "help" is the fastest way to get a leader to stop leading. By staying back in the anchor and waiting for the lead, the man gets the opportunity to do what you are looking for. If he doesn't lead right away, staying disciplined and waiting may draw a questioning look or a "what are you doing?" Many guys will just get the clue and enjoy exercising his responsibility in the dance. Once he understands the situation, you just may find him on his way to being a better partner. In my opinion, if the follower is jumping the lead on count one, she is unknowingly hijacking the dance.
 
Using an analogy from my past, I look at the leader as the quarterback of the team. The play starts when the ball is put in his hands. When we lead on one, we are initiating a play as well. If the follower is already in motion on one...well, in football, that's called illegal motion and draws a penalty.
 
In dancing, the penalty is that the leader forgets how to lead. If he never exercises that muscle, it never gets a chance to develop. Followers need to constantly recheck their status before getting critical about the men they dance with. There are some leaders who may never develop their skills, but do not contribute to their lack of development. Believe me when I say that while you are waiting for a leader to lead, you can practice all kinds of styling and variations in your anchor to make you a better dancer as well. Give him a chance and let him lead...
 
Guys...Don't get too comfortable...Stay tuned to next week...